Hindi music sucks. Well, most of what’s being churned out today, at least.
And before you think this is a baseless statement, I am going to get technical. And medieval on what passes for music.
First off, I like some Hindi music. Lucky Ali was excellent. Daler Mehndi was and is fun. Indian Ocean is amazing but they have long since risen above the cesspool of Indian music. I have a love-hate thing with Himesh Reshammiya. I love him because he’s one of the only artists to become famous with his solo albums and not solely as a playback singer. A feat which used to be not so rare in the times of Lucky Ali and Apache Indian and so on. And man, Himesh really knows what Indian audiences want to hear at really high volumes. Which brings us to why I hate him. Because he sings from his sinuses and every time, he releases an album, the whole country sounds like one huge nasal block. But the man deserves respect. And an ENT specialist.
Today, like much else in the country, all music has bended to the will of the great evil in the west. Bollywood. If you hear a new Hindi song, it’s almost impossible that it’s not from the latest run-of-the-mill Bollywood flick. It’s gotten so that everyone’ll hate the movie but still be blasting the music from the rooftops. (FALTU and Chaar baj gaye anyone?)
Every new singing talent out there wants to be a playback singer. Remember KK, Shaan and even the supposed rocker Vishal Dadlani? Well, they’re now mindless drones in a long processing line of mediocre movie music. The onslaught of reality singing talent shows doesn’t help the cause either. Abhijeet Sawant was only the heart-throb of the nation for all of 5 seconds, before he became just another voice in ‘hits’ like Tees Maar Khan. And right now, that’s the only reality awaiting the winners of the dozens of singing reality shows in the country. The road to obscurity never seemed so certain.
Next up, is what the singers are singing about. Almost 80% of Hindi, well let’s cut the shit, Bollywood music lyrics is all weepy and teary stuff. It’s all about love, my first crush, I miss you, will you be my girlfriend, please don’t go away foreigner guy, oh it’s so beautiful when it rains, and such other weepy stuff.
Bollywood music fans might not notice the difference, but it’s exactly the same reason why the younger generation loved the music of Rock On. It sang about laundry bills and a fairy-tale sailor, a refreshing change from the monotony of mush. Not great lyrics (I’m sorry Javed Akhtar, it’s true) but a refreshing start.
Let’s put it this way. The average Indian man is NOT sophisticated, soft or elegant. The recent World Cup will have proved that. So why then does our music give the impression that we’d burst into tears if we spotted a sad puppy?
And what is with Indian music all sounding the same? Wailing vocals and a dhak-chik dhak-chik in the background. What genre is this? Indipop you say? Please. That’s a myth. Go ahead, define it.
…
I thought as much. Nothing comes to mind, does it? Not to make you feel bad, Hindi uh Bollywood music. But all over the world, there’s rock, pop, reggae, blues, soul, funk, electronic, classical, jazz, Motown, World music and a ton more. All you’ve got is indescribable sounds and Bhangra. Bollywood really owes the Punjabis big time for bringing a bit of variety to it's music. Balle Balle indeed.
And if not either of the two, there’s remixes. It’s simple. Take old song. Add beats. Serve.
The last bit is the audience themselves. While English music listeners in India (me!) will give a good Hindi song a listen and a like, the average Hindi music fan remains a die-hard fan of his language. It’s all ‘yeh kya gaana bajaa raha hain?’ and ‘kucch maalum hi nahin padta hain’. Fine, don’t listen to English music. There’s a world out there. Brazilian, African and even the non-lingual electronic music. But sadly, much like we protect our customs, we remain afraid of being infected.
Please Anna Hazare, India doesn’t need to change how it behaves so urgently. Maybe I can bear that a little longer. Let’s change how we sound first.
And before you think this is a baseless statement, I am going to get technical. And medieval on what passes for music.
First off, I like some Hindi music. Lucky Ali was excellent. Daler Mehndi was and is fun. Indian Ocean is amazing but they have long since risen above the cesspool of Indian music. I have a love-hate thing with Himesh Reshammiya. I love him because he’s one of the only artists to become famous with his solo albums and not solely as a playback singer. A feat which used to be not so rare in the times of Lucky Ali and Apache Indian and so on. And man, Himesh really knows what Indian audiences want to hear at really high volumes. Which brings us to why I hate him. Because he sings from his sinuses and every time, he releases an album, the whole country sounds like one huge nasal block. But the man deserves respect. And an ENT specialist.
Today, like much else in the country, all music has bended to the will of the great evil in the west. Bollywood. If you hear a new Hindi song, it’s almost impossible that it’s not from the latest run-of-the-mill Bollywood flick. It’s gotten so that everyone’ll hate the movie but still be blasting the music from the rooftops. (FALTU and Chaar baj gaye anyone?)
Every new singing talent out there wants to be a playback singer. Remember KK, Shaan and even the supposed rocker Vishal Dadlani? Well, they’re now mindless drones in a long processing line of mediocre movie music. The onslaught of reality singing talent shows doesn’t help the cause either. Abhijeet Sawant was only the heart-throb of the nation for all of 5 seconds, before he became just another voice in ‘hits’ like Tees Maar Khan. And right now, that’s the only reality awaiting the winners of the dozens of singing reality shows in the country. The road to obscurity never seemed so certain.
Next up, is what the singers are singing about. Almost 80% of Hindi, well let’s cut the shit, Bollywood music lyrics is all weepy and teary stuff. It’s all about love, my first crush, I miss you, will you be my girlfriend, please don’t go away foreigner guy, oh it’s so beautiful when it rains, and such other weepy stuff.
Bollywood music fans might not notice the difference, but it’s exactly the same reason why the younger generation loved the music of Rock On. It sang about laundry bills and a fairy-tale sailor, a refreshing change from the monotony of mush. Not great lyrics (I’m sorry Javed Akhtar, it’s true) but a refreshing start.
Let’s put it this way. The average Indian man is NOT sophisticated, soft or elegant. The recent World Cup will have proved that. So why then does our music give the impression that we’d burst into tears if we spotted a sad puppy?
And what is with Indian music all sounding the same? Wailing vocals and a dhak-chik dhak-chik in the background. What genre is this? Indipop you say? Please. That’s a myth. Go ahead, define it.
…
I thought as much. Nothing comes to mind, does it? Not to make you feel bad, Hindi uh Bollywood music. But all over the world, there’s rock, pop, reggae, blues, soul, funk, electronic, classical, jazz, Motown, World music and a ton more. All you’ve got is indescribable sounds and Bhangra. Bollywood really owes the Punjabis big time for bringing a bit of variety to it's music. Balle Balle indeed.
And if not either of the two, there’s remixes. It’s simple. Take old song. Add beats. Serve.
The last bit is the audience themselves. While English music listeners in India (me!) will give a good Hindi song a listen and a like, the average Hindi music fan remains a die-hard fan of his language. It’s all ‘yeh kya gaana bajaa raha hain?’ and ‘kucch maalum hi nahin padta hain’. Fine, don’t listen to English music. There’s a world out there. Brazilian, African and even the non-lingual electronic music. But sadly, much like we protect our customs, we remain afraid of being infected.
Please Anna Hazare, India doesn’t need to change how it behaves so urgently. Maybe I can bear that a little longer. Let’s change how we sound first.
